How to Come Out Safely as Trans

Afraid of coming out? Don't know where to begin? Continue reading to learn helpful tips and tricks. (Yes I know these images don't fit, but I really don't want to look around for some stock image so here's another of my drawing. Sorry for the lack of effort. Image credit - me)

Do you know that you're trans but don't know how to come out to others? Afraid that you might be disowned or lose connections and relationships with people? How do you go about such a crucial and critical moment in your life?

I've been in this exact same situation before. When you have something as important and controversial as this to tell, you naturally try to avoid any possible consequences that may follow your announcement. This may entail delaying telling people or even avoiding it altogether. The issue with this though is that the sooner you tell people, the better.

Running from reality is a dangerous game to play and one you should definitely avoid. How so? This post will help answer just that.

Coming Out Tips and Tricks

There are a variety of useful ways to approach the coming out experience. Here are some of them:

1. Do Some Research About Friends and Family

If you're afraid that they may be less than supportive, it's a good idea to do some background checks. Dig around your knowledge of them and their history. One fair warning though is that you don't want to come off as some sort of undercover cop. Make it natural if you have to ask questions. Also to understand is that you can run into touchy subjects. Be careful in whatever you do and say.

To avoid questioning people about their beliefs, examining the past is the best way to go. An example of this would be analyzing what your parents watch on TV. You can most likely connect the dots between what they watch, have as hobbies, interests, etc. to perhaps have a general understanding of how they view transitioning.

Another example would be viewing how they treat others. Even if it's not direct, you can pick up on nonverbal clues such as body language and voice tone to gain more insight.

2. Beat Around the Bush

If you feel more adventurous and aren't afraid of taking on more risk, then start by slowly introducing your new self. Depending on what you do, you may have to explain your way out of the situation so please do be careful.

What I mean about beating around the bush is to entice the idea that you're trans slowly to those that you need to tell. This could mean changing your hair, e.g. letting it grow out or cut it short. Now obviously this could bring so many questions your way and many parents would straight up disapprove of this and punish you. That's why I said you have to be willing to take on risk.

If you provoke a response from your parents/friends, then it's a good time to come out. If you aren't comfortable at that point in time or aren't comfortable with the possibility of it happening at that given moment, then this isn't something you should do.

3. Doing it

If you really want to push your luck and give a shot at faith, then coming forward straight up and being real about it is about as real as it gets.

Doing this requires careful wording. To make it somewhat easier to lead into, you can start off by asking what they think about transgender people. They may add to their response by asking you questions about yourself. If this happens, then you don't have a choice but to explain.

A negative response can be salvaged if you go and pretend to agree with them. Make fake jokes about transgender people to save you by the skin of your teeth. It's undoubtedly awful to say horrible things about yourself, and as a result, this should be reserved as a last-ditch effort.

What if You Can't?

The worst-case scenario is that you cannot proceed with any form of coming out whatsoever. Whether it be because you already know how badly the response will be or you don't have the confidence, then there is only one thing you can really do.

Wait.

Yes. Just wait it out. This means going through all the struggles and pain and suffering that may follow. One day when you're living on your own, perhaps then you can start transitioning as you see fit. It might mean hormones. It might mean surgery. It might mean cutting off ties with friends and family.

See why it's important to come out ASAP? If you're dependent on your family to support you or don't want to lose relations with people, then you have to come out. As scary as it is, you have to someday sooner or later.

It's a grisly thought but a very real possibility that so many have to face. If you're struggling to love yourself in times like these, this post may help. Future posts will also help, so follow and subscribe to avoid losing out on the important tea. Share this post if you know people who could benefit.

With all of that said, thank you for reading.